Cafe Curveball
By Shane Remer

"You have no idea just how ridiculous you look right now."

Jason stopped. He held the cup of coffee with his left arm parallel to the table and most of his torso leaning over it. His light blue eyes switched focus from the coffee to his friend, Mark, sitting across the table, finishing his lunch break.

"WhatÉ I don't want to spill any coffee on my shirt," Jason offered as his response.

"Yeah, well, you might want to consider it."

"What," Jason stared back, his eyes wide and ringing with an uncomfortable anxiety. "Why do you say that?"

"It's said that coffee has a scent strong enough to hide almost any other smell."

"Do I smell bad or something?"

Mark watched as his friend nervously checked for a bad stench. A childish smirk crawled across his face. Jason was very gullible when nervous.

"Relax man. Just relax."

Jason drew a deep breath. The stress of all his waiting started to affect him.

"I wish I could," Jason said. "It's just Ð well, you know my luck."

Mark nodded.

"I mean, I'll be the first to admit I'm a wreck right now," Jason finished.

Mark took a quick glance at his watch. He only had a few minutes before he had to return to work. He decided to stop by the cafŽ for a quick coffee.

"Say, Jason, how long have you been waiting?"

"Oh, I don't know, about thirty minutes. Why?"

"Are you sure you got the right time and place and everything?"

Jason sighed loudly and rolled his eyes.

"Yes, I'm sure. I wrote it down on the nearest piece of paper."

Jason quickly stood up and dug his hands into his pockets, searching for his evidence. Finally, he found it and handed it to Mark.

"Look, see," Jason sat down. "One o'clock at Rick's CafŽ American."

Mark chimed in. "Boise's finest."

"Yeah, yeah," Jason moaned. He paused shortly then resumed. "All I know is that it's almost thirty minutes past and she's very late."

Jason made his closing argument and then raised his hand, signaling for a waitress. While Jason dropped his arm, Mark flipped the paper over that Jason handed him.

"Jason," he asked, his eyes still fixed to the paper. "How many cups of coffee have you had today?"

"I've had three," Jason answered. "And now I'm wishing I didn't stand up to hand you that paper." He paused. "Why do you ask?"

"Well," Mark sat up in his chair. "On the back of this paper is an appointment date to reassess your stomach ulcer."

Before Jason could answer, the waitress he signaled for had made her way to the table. She was a cute brunette with pretty eyes. "What can I get you?"

Jason turned his eyes to her. "A refill on coffee please."

She smiled and took his cup. He said thank you and then shot his eyes back to Mark, who was observing the waitress's butt. Jason's facial expression matched that of a mischievous little boy who knowingly did something wrong as his mother watched.

"You're incredibly," Mark said, somewhat shaking his head. A small laugh escaped him and a smile appeared on his face.

"Enjoy your blind date, Jason. As for me, I need to go."

"You think you need to go," Jason remarked, now feeling the effects of his full bladder. He pushed his legs together and bent forward a little.

Normally, he would just use the bathroom, but he did not want to miss his blind date, which was late. Moreover, it was his first date in two years.

Mark left and the waitress returned with his refill. Jason said thanks. She smiled and returned his thanks with a, "You're welcome."

After taking a small sip, a familiar voice called his name.

"Jason?"

He looked up to see his sister, Erica.

"Jason, why haven't you called me back?"

"Busy?"

"Yeah, I'm sure," she said.

Jason went back to drinking the coffee.

"I talked to Mom and she told me about your ulcer. And by the way, if you have an ulcer, what are you doing here with a cup of coffee?"

"I'm waiting for a blind date," he replied. "What about you?"

"Oh," Erica responded, her voice trailing off. "This is so awkward."